Many times you like to run away from success. You see others, you see them excel at something and admire them. You think they have some kind of talent and you don’t. For you is all about what you do now and that’s ok because you have accepted it. You are not talented and that’s the way it is.
You see people like Usain Bolt and think, he is great at running. Elon Musk is a genius when it comes to entrepreneurship. Steve Jobs was an amazing leader. And actually, you think they are bigger than that. You don’t imagine Usain Bolt being bad at cooking (it probably even didn’t cross your mind he eats), or Elon sucking at math or Steve being a horrible driver.
You actually think they are good at everything. You like to mystify them. As if they are in a whole different human category. In a place, you will never be able to reach. You see a great presenter and say, he just has it and I don’t.
You just don’t realize that to “have it,” means hours and hours of work at it. You are scared of your potential. It’s easier to believe your skills, talents, and intelligence are given at birth. That way there is nothing you can do about it.
You hear yourself say “she is just good at languages.” “He is just good at delivering presentations.”
Trying once can be harder than you think.
But trying again?! No way!
Fixed mindset and growth mindset are key concepts developed by Carol Dweck in her book Mindset. She explains how you actually have a direct influence on your skills, talents and above all intelligence.
Perhaps you have aptitudes that make certain thing easier to comprehend but, I think it’s all based on your motivation and the way you were raised. Although you can’t blame it on the way you were raised because then you release yourself from any responsibility for growth.
In any case, just look at the last time you discover something you loved. You spent hours on it and didn’t care at all. You probably even noticed all the effort you put into it. All you have to do is look at professionals who do something they love.
So what happens when you say you are not good at something without even trying. You close your mind to any possibility of growth. Look at the world around you. Weightlifters were not born that way. Great speakers didn’t start at that level of mastery. And musicians were not born with instruments on their hands.
There is a huge relationship between success and motivation. But to find something you love, you must first explore. The moment you say to yourself “I can’t do something because I’m not good at it,” you stop every possible process of self-improvement.
Don’t be your own obstacle or you will be the biggest obstacle you will have to overcome, ever.
It’s not about experiencing everything. Is about you not holding yourself down. Next time, just believe you can and if you fail, just try again. All it means that you didn’t get it right the first time, is that you were not ready, not that you aren’t good at.
It sort of makes sense. If you throw a baby in the water without teaching him how to swim, it doesn’t mean they suck at swimming. It just means they are not ready.
Don’t be too harsh on yourself and find the strength to try again, and again and again. Soon you will see that you are actually good at many things.
I invite you to join my private letter. In it, you will find more resources to help you build a life around your passion.
If there is anybody you know who may enjoy reading this post, do them and me a favor by sharing it with them.
I want to ask you to think of that thing you’ve always admired others by. That thing you say you are bad but actually it’s because you’ve never really tried to improve it. What is stopping you? I would love to hear your story, please go ahead and share it in the comments section below.
Wish you all the best.